It Is Difficult to Separate Faith and Family

Job 2:1-10

1 On another day the angels came to present themselves before the Lord, and Satan also came with them to present himself before him. 2 And the Lord said to Satan,

“Where have you come from?”

Satan answered the Lord, “From roaming throughout the earth, going back and forth on it.”

3 Then the Lord said to Satan, “Have you considered my servant Job? There is no one on earth like him; he is blameless and upright, a man who fears God and shuns evil. And he still maintains his integrity, though you incited me against him to ruin him without any reason.”

4 “Skin for skin!” Satan replied. “A man will give all he has for his own life. 5 But now stretch out your hand and strike his flesh and bones, and he will surely curse you to your face.”

6 The Lord said to Satan, “Very well, then, he is in your hands; but you must spare his life.”

7 So Satan went out from the presence of the Lord and afflicted Job with painful sores from the soles of his feet to the crown of his head. 8 Then Job took a piece of broken pottery and scraped himself with it as he sat among the ashes.

9 His wife said to him, “Are you still maintaining your integrity? Curse God and die!”

10 He replied, “You are talking like a foolish woman. Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble?”

In all this, Job did not sin in what he said.

It Is Difficult – If not Impossible – to Separate Faith and Family

Where was the dagger? Last week we read about all that Job had lost – how the Chaldeans and Sabeans had attacked, how freak “acts of God” took Job’s most treasured possessions from him. Before Job could catch his breath, he’s hit with the next blow, the next piece of bad news.

But where was the dagger? Which piece of news hit him the hardest? I can tell you it wasn’t the camels or donkeys. It was the loss of all ten of his children in a single moment.

Or, how about today? We just read about how the devil afflicted Job with painful sores from the soles of his feet to the crown of his head. This wasn’t just a severe case of chickenpox. As we read further, we find more symptoms. He was emaciated and delirious. He was burning with fever but chilled to the bone. He couldn’t sleep. He couldn’t eat. He had a gnawing, nagging, endless pain all over his body, inside and out.

But where was the dagger? What was the worst part of that whole experience? It wasn’t the pain that caused him to scrape shards of broken pottery over his skin. It was almost certainly the words his wife spoke to him, “Are you still maintaining your integrity? Curse God and die!”

Humans have a remarkable capacity for enduring pain and loss, but when you hit us in the family, that’s when the knees grow weak. That’s when pain turns to heartbreak. And where pain merely cripples, heartbreak can kill, can destroy your will to live, can compromise your integrity, and call your faith in God into question.

The devil knew what he was doing when he afflicted Job, because the devil knows a truth that we can’t afford to ignore: it is difficult – if not impossible – to separate faith and family, and Job demonstrates that truth powerfully.

Job’s love for his family positively bleeds off the page – and we barely hear anything about them! Here are the things we know about Job’s children: There were 10 of them – 7 boys and 3 girls. And they were close. They loved each other and spent time together.

What parent doesn’t want that for their children? They were Job’s pride and joy, and even though they were likely all out of the house, Job clearly still cared about them because he regularly, habitually offered sacrifices for them.

Job couldn’t separate his faith and his family. His love for his children compelled him to pray for them and serve as their family priest to purify them before God, asking forgiveness for any sins they might have committed. And as someone who is described as blameless and upright, a man who feared God and shunned evil, you know that he didn’t hide these sacrifices in a corner or develop this habit after his kids left the house. It would have been “on brand” for Job to be saying these prayers and offering these sacrifices while they were young and in his home.

Ultimately the Bible doesn’t tell us their spiritual condition on the day a mighty wind swept in from the desert, but we do know their spiritual upbringing, which may give us insight into why Job the way he does. He suffered so much heartbreak at the death of his children but he could not separate faith and family, and at the news of their deaths, he fell to the ground in worship and said: “Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked I will depart. The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised.”

How could Job fall to the ground in worship and praise when he learned of their deaths? Because Job didn’t separate faith and family. In the Venn Diagram of life, everything falls within the context of our faith in God.

For Job, that meant that when those children were born, he recognized them for what they were – blessings and gifts to him, yes, but much more than that, children of God first. That’s why during their childhood they most certainly heard Job pray for them and saw him offer sacrifices for them, because Job didn’t separate faith and family. He didn’t hide his faith away in a corner or wait for his children to make up their own minds. He spoke to them early and often about the goodness and grace of God.

And when his children died, Job could recall the lessons he taught them about the mercy of God and God’s love for sinners. When he was separated from his family, Job could remember that nothing can separate us from the love of God in Christ. And even though Job lived long before Jesus was born, he clearly put his faith in the coming of the promised Savior and in the hope that heaven belongs to all who believe.

Job understood the power of the Gospel and knew that if his children only walked away with faith the size of a mustard seed, then they were not lost forever. And someday, when his time on earth expired, he would see them again in heaven by the grace of God.

The reason Job could worship and praise God even amid the heartbreak of losing his 10 children, was because he didn’t separate faith and family.

But Job wasn’t the only one who lost everything that day. She’s only mentioned twice in the entire book, so it’s easy to forget that Job’s wife suffered in almost all the ways he did. Her wealth was taken from her. Her children were taken from her. The only affliction she didn’t share with Job were the painful sores, but even those she had to watch cause pain to her husband.

Job’s wife’s suffering was very similar to his own, but her reaction couldn’t have been more different: His wife said to him, “Are you still maintaining your integrity? Curse God and die!”

Far from be it from me to condemn the woman. I can’t read her heart and God doesn’t write her story, so it’s not for us to judge. But what is really striking about her words is the eerie way they mirror God’s conversation with Satan. God defended Job: “He still maintains his integrity…” to which Satan responded: “Strike his flesh and bones, and he will surely curse you to your face.”

It’s eerie how Job’s own wife becomes a mouthpiece for Satan. And that’s not to say that she was a Satan worshiper, that Satan had possessed her, that she had even lost her faith in God. There are all kinds of reasons she could have encouraged Job to curse God. Maybe, in misplaced love, she just wanted Job’s suffering to be over.

Whatever the case, we do learn two important truths from this interaction. The first is that the road to hell is paved with good intentions. We’ll talk about this more next week but, if we get careless in the way that we speak to other people, we could end up as mouthpieces for Satan too. We need to guard our words carefully. Again, we’ll talk about that more next week.

Getting back to our theme for today, the second important truth we learn is how important it is to be on the same spiritual page as your spouse. Your spouse is the one person in all the world who knows you best. They know your strengths and your weaknesses. They know the words that would knock you to the ground and the words that can pick you up out of the dust. They have the power to be your greatest help or cause you the most heartache.

Job’s wife caused him considerable heartache here. When he needed encouragement and support and someone to be there to help him rally and find refuge in God, she was pushing him toward the edge and urging him to end it at all costs. It’s not only that Job was alone; it’s that his dearest, closest, most treasured relationship was actively opposing God in Job’s life.

That’s no way to live, and it helps to prove that faith and family are impossible to separate. Your relationship with family is defined by your faith in God (or lack thereof, at this moment in Mrs. Job’s life).

But how does Job respond? “You are talking like a foolish woman,” he says. “Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble?”

At first blush his words may seem harsh, but don’t read too much into them. This is a loving rebuke from a husband who cares and who, even in the midst of his own intense, personal, physical suffering, is finding a way to comfort his wife. She’s suffering too, and she needs to be reminded of the goodness of God.

That’s why Job asks, “Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble?” It’s a gentle way to call to mind all the good things that God has done. In their earthly lives that was certainly true. God had blessed them beyond measure, and sometimes it takes losing something to fully appreciate how good it was – how good God was to give it to you.

In their spiritual lives that was even more true. God was good to them. He loved them despite their sin or despair, despite the moments of weakness when they lost their faith or hope. He loved them still and held out hope beyond this world to a place in heaven where he would wipe every tear from their eyes and soothe every pain.

For Job and his wife, that was just a promise, but a promise they could cling to in the worst of times. For you and me, it’s the reality we see every time we look at the cross and think of the empty tomb. We have a God who loves us and no matter what we lose on this earth we cannot lose more than he lost for us when he sacrificed Jesus for our sin. He did it out of love for you, to claim you as his children and make you part of his family by faith.

Faith and family are impossible to separate. God has joined you to his family by faith. And it’s that same faith in Jesus our Savior that guides your interactions with your earthly family.

So, take a page out of Job’s book. Live out your faith with your family; don’t hide it in a corner. Speak of the goodness of God early and often. Make room for spiritual conversation and meditation with your spouse. Say prayers with and for your children.

If God hasn’t given you a spouse yet, pray that he would give you one who is on the same spiritual page, and make that a priority in your dating. Better than a sense of humor or a shared interest is a common faith so that you rejoice together in the good God gives, and lift each other up in the bad times too.

It’s difficult – if not impossible – to separate faith and family, and that is an incredible blessing from our God. May he use you for the eternal good of your family just as he has given them to you for your eternal good too. Amen.